I remember my fascination with yoga began with arm balancing and inversions: something about integrating the parts of one’s body and consciousness to move as a unit and defy gravity, while remainingtranquil hooked me to the subject. So I went to my first yoga class at a yoga/spinning studio in Toronto, Canada called Spynga. I know: what??? We would vigorously spin for 45 mins and do “yoga” at the end for 15 minutes on the bike, with the occasional instructor moving us to the mat. I quickly realized that class style was not going to satisfy my curiosity and transitioned to a classic yoga studio (Yoga Tree) a few weeks later and began my dedicated, almost 6 days a week, yoga practice. My teacher at that time, Karin, showed us the transition from sirsasana (headstand) to pincha mayurasana (forearmstand) to vrischikasana (scorpion), and I scoffed and rolled my eyes. Just the idea of performing that sequencing was laughable. I wrote myself off, as my body had no clue, no reference point on how to even begin ‘training’ to perform such a sequence. That was 12 years ago.

I find myself emotional as I write this: the way I dismissed my physical capacity because my mind couldn’t ‘comprehend’ the mechanics. So much of my life and the life of those I’m fortunate to serve have been filtered through a mind that is dismissive, doubting, and defeating. As someone who now practices sirsasana daily, transitions into pincha mayurasana joyfully, and occasionally can stick a vrischikasana, it saddens me to notice that if I listened to my mind all those years ago, I may have never come to the strength, integration, and equanimity that I now know and feel in my life and yoga practice. And it’s something I often have to remind myself and others about in my yoga and coaching sessions. The idea of non-attachment: not being concerned with the outcomes and committing to practice daily. “Practice and all is coming” as per Sri K. Pattabhi Jois.

One of my most impactful teachers would often say ‘the practice will meet you where you are.’ For a while, I was at the asana. I wanted to gain space, range, and dimensionality in my physical body. I wanted to inhabit every fiber, cell, and square inch of my human husk. This desire led to increased sensitivity in my being and naturally, my practice developed more subtle streams. I never quite fully delved into the other limbs of the 8-limb path as much as I did asana, and knowing those petals existed made them an accessible support when needed. Pratyahara, the withdrawal of the senses, has especially allowed me to discover and open myself up to Greater Inspiration in unparalleled ways, including fleeting experiences of Samadhi (absorption). It also had begun to meet me in philosophical ways, although rather than feeding the socially conditioned split between mind and body, my life experiences led me to the practice of somatics, bridging the gap between sutra and asana. It was always my style to speak about the spirit while teaching asana, and in the last year, I feel I have shed a distinct covering on my soul, a layer of my self that was hidden beneath the voices of other educators and social constructs. I’ve come into my own, walking in a truth that needs no external validation, acknowledgement, or praise to be valuable and meaningful.

Yoga, alongside many, many other disciplines and practices, was one of my first entry points into the world of centering, integration, and harmony. It gave me a tangible practice that anchored my soul into my body. It gave me a sensitivity from pores to cells, mind to muscle. It gave me a resource for resilience, enduring life in a body that has experienced external diminishing since its inception. And as a teacher, it gave me an opportunity to witness other bodies, other beings, yearning for liberation via space, introspection, and proprioception.

It gave me a gift of a fullness of life. And I’m so honored to be a conduit in offering this gift to others.

Learn more about aasia at siaontheotherside.com.

Join us on June 8 for aasia's workshop, Quiet Channels: Creating a Steady Postural Base for Tranquil Asana.